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Andrew in a fatsuit

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September 20th, 2010

lab

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Spontaneous anger release time! Don't worry, this will be over quickly.

Thank you, dear Art & Internet for having a three-hour long class in the film building computer lab. Thank you for not allowing me to use one of the several free computers to quietly do my own editing for a project that is due Wednesday. Thank you for making me come back later despite being on the sick side and would rather do this work earlier so I can get more sleep.

I mean, honestly, there's no real need for me to be bitching right now because I have a crapload of other work I need to do and don't need the lab for, but still... it's more than a little bit annoying. That lab is for all the film students' use. I understand, classes need the computers too, but it's not like I'd have disrupted the class or anything.

Anyway, that's that. I just needed a locale to vent about something so minuscule but with too much text for, say, a spontaneous anger release Facebook status update or misplacing my twitter's focus on the entertainment world (I occasionally use it for some of my film student centric woes - it's related).

Thend.

PS: Chuck returns tonight. I probably won't have time to steal away to a television to watch it. Oh poo.

September 13th, 2010

garden

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Okay, so, for what has felt like a lifetime (read: like, three years) I just haven't cared about fan fiction. I've kept semi-active on LA for the purpose of being around people I like and occasionally RPing, but... and I feel like a total nerd admitting this, but after reading The Secret Garden for my Children's Literature class, I just want to read fan fiction. It's just so ripe for fan fiction - exploring the Mary/Colin/Dickon trio in latering years, conflicting social circumstances, I just wondered all the time what would change and how it would be changed and how the introduction of World War I as they grow up and the changing social world of the 20th century could affect any romantic inclinations within this trio. I already went to FF.net, read a oneshot, and then... decided I can't stand reading Dickon's Yorkshire accent the way it was written in The Secret Garden in any romantic way, hahaha. But you can't blame me! We talked in class about Dickon's "sexiness" and his and Mary's friendship reminded me of the much more romantically-inclined Lyra/Will relationship from His Dark Materials and now I want to read His Dark Materials and gah.

Oh well, this'll pass as I don't have time and have new episodes of Mad Men and True Blood to watch anyway!

August 23rd, 2010

loopy

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Ron is BORED
Robert Roldan, it kills me how attractive you are and you go and update your twitter icon with something much more epically attractive than before dude I cannot stand this so stop it now because I feel like some creepy fangirl (which I am) so you should just stop being pretty and talented like right now.

Juuuust kidding. Keep on being pretty and especially being talented. Also, come back if they do all-stars next season; it's the only condition I can truly accept your placement on season 7 (though, no complaints; I love you, dearest LoFro, and you are amahhhhzing).

It's late, I'm tired, I wasted my night watching Pride and Prejudice on television instead of doing work, and therefore I'm a bit loopy, especially since, with my timeline, this means three coverages tomorrow. killmenow.

BTW, can there be people as pretty and talented that I ACTUALLY KNOW? Bonus if they're straight and single. Just sayin', I'd appreciate it.

Now off to my favorite awkward ginger, dearest Ronald Weasley in Harry Potter, as I am on my way through the HBP reread (Bingley in P&P is totally me second favorite awkward ginger. Is he a ginger in the book? I can't remember; it's been way long since I read it).

Pointless post is pointless. The end.

August 19th, 2010

enduring

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Andrew in a fatsuit
My freakin GOD I need to get back to school and sanity. I am barely enduring these last couple weeks.

Never thought I would call the hipster brigade of Bard SANITY, but compared to the shit the internet has spouted at me recently, yeah, that's sanity.

BRIGHT SIDE is that I'm wasting good ol' time with a clan of people I admit my fancy for on Oh No They Didn't - snarky, intelligent, and totally willing to be internet-y and hosting Potter parties all the time, which I approve of.

DOWN SIDE is that Entertainment Weekly's comments section are full of so many stupid douchebags. I don't get why some people even go there when all they ever have to say are negative things or complain about the website/magazine or entertainment industry. IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, GO AWAY. I like it, so stfu.

WAY DOWN SIDE is that I've put so much of my internship work off to the last minute, so I really don't have the freedom to go running around outside the house to cheer my sorry ass up, which I would love to do, believe me, because the internet is killing me with its stupidity.

I'm so ready to go back that I'm nearly packed nine days ahead of time. But once I get back, life can be good again. I can be around real people and learn real things and be outside and such things. I will miss my cats so freakin much and my parents to a lesser extent, but I need to gtfo of here.

So, in order to move closer to getting the hell out of here, I'll stop procrastinating and do my god-dammed work.

BTWs - this summer's movie fare is so slow. I think my theater-going has been limited to Iron Man 2, Shrek Forever After (it was at the drive-in with IM2 or else I wouldn't have bothered), Inception, Toy Story 3 (twice), Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work, Sex and the City 2 (my mother's idea), and Despicable Me. That's ALL summer, not even just recently. I've also watched a few Netflixes, but even then, not nearly as many as I usually try to cram into breaks (I still have The Beaches of Agnes and King Lear to get through). I'd LIKE to get out to see Winter's Bone and The Kids Are All Right, but I'm not sure I'll have time.

Work. Now. Happening. Laters, lj. Til a few months later when I am bored/procrastinating enough to post in you.

June 12th, 2010

around

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Counting: BSG style
Though it may have been months since my last post, I protest that I am still vaguely around.

I even made a new blog post this early morning (http://sarahelmovies.blogspot.com/2010/06/worst-episode-of-good-shows-competition.html) ...just on my legit blog rather than my livejournal.

It's funny, actually, I went through my old livejournals several weeks ago looking for something to use in a video piece I was working on. I was heartily amused by my younger self and my life back then. It's bizarre, truly, to see me at fourteen and then look at me now and think about the difference.

Particularly amusing because my childhood is COMING ALIVE AGAIN with Toy Story 3's release next weekend. (sodamnexcited)

I've been rereading books from my childhood. I reread The Giver and Catherine, Called Birdy and last night I ordered The Girl Who Owned a City (because the local library fails and doesn't have it, nor does the bookstores nearby, I mean jeezum crow!). I also ordered the last Georgia Nicolson book and Look at This F*cking Hipster, but those have little to do with my childhood. x)

But childhood's over and I've got responsibilities now that I really should be getting on the ball with. I've started my internship reading screenplays, well, sort of. I've got the account, I just need to actually pick a screenplay and get reading! But I'll do that this afternoon sometime.

It's so weird, because when I was younger, I couldn't have seen this and I still can't see where I'll be next year. The times, they are a'changin'. For realsies, yo.

http://twitter.com/sarahel19

...gah, some things never change though, like my mom and I being at each other's throats for no real reason (I have no idea why, but she just manages to get under my skin).

September 26th, 2009

living

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Just to alert you all that I still remain alive, just not on livejournal very frequently, I thought I'd make this post. Schoolwork has totally swamped me from everything (even my movie blog, which, if you check at all, has very clearly been infrequently posted in recently). On the plus side, I'm getting ready to shoot my first 16mm film today, which will be fun (hopefully). I'm happy as it is cloudy out and therefore less chance of overexposure! Hurrah! I'm just waiting for my subject to get out of her lab so that we can shoot and so I thought I'd take this opportunity to post here, especially since I'm still haunting the communities.

Today is also my darlingest elder cat's 16th birthday. Yay Creampuff!

He should totally get a driver's permit.

Just sayin'.

Anyway, life is good albeit crazy busy, hence my lack of attention here. But I live! I promise!

July 17th, 2009

blog

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I made one for the film rants that tend to have populated my lj for a while now. >.> It's probably crap, but whatevs.

http://sarahelmovies.blogspot.com/

Also in proper news, going to California has fallen through but instead, I'm visiting my aunt in Venezuela for a week. This is a mildly frightening concept because I have never been on a plane before and I have an overnight layover in Miami where I don't know anyone. So I'm a tad bit nervous about the whole thing (I'm leaving something like August 12th?) But it's still definitely cool to be able to go on my first flight and get out of the country (not counting my oh-so-amazing trip to Montreal to visit colleges).

July 9th, 2009

Nine

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Let us take a moment to note just how bitchin' Nine looks! I have not seen the musical, as I have seen very few musicals live, but I just watched the trailer for the upcoming movie three times and am still in love with how it looks like it will turn out. Just note that amazingly awesome international Oscar-winning cast (save two; one is a nominee and the other is Fergie). Daniel Day-Lewis amongst many women, such as Marion Cotillard, Penelope Cruz, Judi Dench, Kate Hudson, Sophia Lauren, Nicole Kidman, and Fergie, with FAB vocals over the trailer. The visuals are already stunning, and I just rewatched Chicago, so that this is being directed by the same guy, Rob Marshall, makes me enthusiastic (I had forgotten just how amazing the movie Chicago is).

I was lamenting over how few movies I was psyched for this coming fall season (also known as I Want An Oscar! season), but then I stumble into Nine, which I had heard about before but not ventured much into. But after seeing the trailer and obsessing over the cast... I'm excited.

And also, major props to Kate Hudson for doing a real movie again. It's been too long, Kate. Please, hang up the rom coms and do real movies. You were so good in Almost Famous! You're a past Oscar nominee! You deserve better. At least pick your rom coms better if you're going to do any.

And although I pay little to no attention to Fergie despite my respect for her as a good vocalist and performer (I just don't pay much attention on the music front), I am very excited to see her in Nine as well.

Last note: other movies this fall I'm excited for? Mostly Sherlock Holmes, which comes out on Christmas. Although Tim Burton-produced 9 looks very interesting and potentially good. I was almost excited for The Road since I started reading it and already really love it, but then I watched the preview and can't hide my displeasure at it looking rather mediocre. This is disappointing as Cormac McCarthy is a great author and No Country for Old Men was wicked good. Oh well. I'll just settle down and enjoy the book.

Final note, for reals: Where the fuck is the Academy going to find 10 Best Picture Nominees without any filler? BTWs, Academy, Star Trek and Up will be filler when you nominate them. They are both good, but we all know they have no chance of winning. The point of five nominees was that they all had a chance of winning... even if it is a slim to none chance like going up against Slumdog Millionaire. But my point is that if Slumdog Millionaire hadn't been the awards sweeper it was, the other four films would've had a chance (well, maybe not The Reader... but I'm still spiteful over the lack of The Dark Knight). I loved Up and really liked Star Trek, but let's not kid ourselves, unless every drama that comes out this year is total suck, neither of those films would ever win Best Picture.

So screw you Academy for another stupid decision. Oh and PLEASE bring back the clips. Seeing Tilda Swinton in another bag, Sophia Lauren with way too much makeup and boobage, and Whoopi Goldberg's unfortunate pattern choice talking about actors they may or may not know very well (which totally ruins it when one winner and nominee are paired perfectly and another are a total mismatch; completely unfair to the poor nominee that was mismatched!) is PAINFUL. I much prefer seeing the clips from movies that actually show us why these actors deserves an Oscar. Isn't that the point of movies? To be shown instead of told (something Public Enemies should have known better)?

And thus ends another longer-than-intended Sarah-rants/raves-about-movies segment.

Have a good night.

July 8th, 2009

frak

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Okay, so, I don't watch a lot of TV (shows I view regularly are: House, Heroes, Mad Men, Chuck, and, yes, I'm not ashamed to admit it, Gossip Girl) but let me interject here once again by reminding the world that Battlestar Galactica is one of the best frakkin television shows ever, and definitely one of the best dramas. Now I have never really cared about the Emmys in the past because I don't watch much television, but let me reiterate a call Michael Slezak made on EW.com - frakkin nominate Edward James Olmos, Mary McDonnel, and while we're at it, the entire show for some Emmys! Honestly, I'd also make a push for Tricia Helfer; I am always impressed by her ability to play all the Sixes and each of them with their own similar but distinct and fully rounded personalities. And if it was any season but the fourth, I'd also push for James Callis (Baltar was pretty lame in season 4, but astonishing in season 2, for instance - between the parts where he was stranded on Kobol to the Pegasus arc and all the way to his presidency bid, his character was fully realized in season 2).

But all in all, BSG is the best piece of television I've devoted myself to in a while. I don't get into a lot of TV shows because most of them are boring, repetitive, or only have so many good qualities. BSG, however, is excellently-written with a wonderful cast, not only with the leading members, but also with the secondary characters, from Laura Roslin herself all the way down to Doc Coddle, and everyone in-between, like Gaeta, the little favourite-character-turned-LEAST-favourite, but all done with such character... But where was I? Oh yes, and with the most original plot on television, even if it is based off of a previous series and shares similarities with every other space epic. But the way it twists and turns, always making sense, evolving and changing not to fit the writers' whims, but to fit what seems natural, that is in itself a characteristic too few television shows these days do.

Too many shows are afraid of change and stick to their formulatic tendencies. To an extent, that's enjoyable. House operates with its Patient Of The Week, Chuck has his Mission Of The Week, even BSG has its "oh we're out of food/air/water/sleep/fuel/etc. so we've got to find it ASAP" episodes. But each of these series also admirably took big risks, shaking up the formula. House just sent its main character off to rehab, for real. Now THAT is epic. Chuck lost the intersect... got it back... and learned kung-fu. WTF of AWESOME! BSG... gradually eliminated all the ways in which Cylons were inhuman, from turning them into humanoid form to making the girls get pregnant to destroying resurrection! Now isn't it cool when your enemy is suddenly not so different? (This is something I have to constantly remind my mother when she says that the Cylons are "evil.")

Anyway, without getting too plot heavy, my point is that BSG needs some frakkin love, Emmys/rest of the world. Watch it, love it, experience some of the best television ever.

But then again, what kind of hack am I? I watch Gossip Girl and cheer internally everytime Chuck and Blair share a scene. And I totally don't disagree with the random chick on EW.com who said Leighton Meester deserves some recognition (Blair is definitely the most interesting and fully realized character on the show. Also the wittiest. Scenes without her or Chuck suffer from being dreadfully boring at times).

Ahem. As I was saying, check out Battlestar Galactica, you frakkin morons, and understand why the frak I keep saying frak.

July 3rd, 2009

improvement

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Feeling a lot better. Things have calmed down. Weather still bites though. FU rain! >.<

I also read through some old Entertainment Weekly magazines I found in the bathroom. Crazy shit reading about Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt divorcing and House's first season (and the planned Emmy push for Hugh Laurie) and Paradise Hotel (which I think I actually watched a few episodes of before my mother chided me for it, calling it "trash." But it was so entertaining!). Crazy shit, man.

Also, I found it totally hot that Bend It Like Beckham was on the Must List. Damn straight, EW!

testy

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I don't think it's whatever double standards and shit that have me so testy and upset. I really don't know what does have me so pissed off and angsty. I flipped out and told my mother about my feelings about the "double standards" in the past but, once again, my mother, being who she is, complains how I'm bringing up "middle school stuff" from the past that isn't important anymore.

I can't stop this attitude of mine or how upset I keep getting. My parents are no help. I just want to stop being so emotional. I'm not normally like this and I hate acting like this. I feel like a spoiled, bratty twelve-year-old. I'm not like this. I'm normally more mature, collected, casual. I mean, I used to be like this. But I stopped, and for good reason, because I didn't like the person I was. I don't like the person I am right now. But I don't know how to make it stop. And until then, I feel a horrible mix of guilt for acting this way and misery for acting this way as well as the general overemotional behaviour I am currently exhibiting. It's so painful to just watch myself act so stupidly. But every time I try to explain this, I just feel and act worse.

I don't get this. And the worst part is that now I'm sure I've lost my parents' respect by being this way. Great. It's bad enough that when I'm acting my age my parents still treat me like a child. Now that I'm acting like one, I deserve that. But when I eventually get better and try to forget this, I'm betting they won't. Fucking great.

I thought I was done growing up. Guess I'm having a mental recession. Here's looking at you, John McCain.

At least I can still be a witty miserable teenager?

Nine and a half more months until there's no more teen in my age. Can't come soon enough. Wish that would fix things, but I'm guessing it won't.

Fuck. This. Shit. >.<

June 30th, 2009

peace

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I saw Up again. I cried at least on three, maybe four, occasions. Although it's not my favourite Pixar films because, as good as it is, it's no WALL-E/Toy Story, it definitely got to me more than probably any of those other films ever has. I mean, I cry during most movies I see, or at least tear up, if I like them at all, but I don't usually cry more than once or twice. Kudos, Up!

Speaking of movies, let me count how many people want to go see Public Enemies with me. Hmm... seven off of the top of my head. This will be interesting to actually make happen. BUT I AM PSYCHED. I am way excited to see that movie.

I was thinking yesterday, as I fled the house and my dramatically upset pissiness, about why I love movies, and I realize that it's for the same reasons as everyone else, really. I went to go see Up to escape my life, to thoroughly enjoy a good-looking, well-written story, and that's really why I see all movies, even the prestigious ones, even the bad ones, even the BAMF ones - I see them because I love getting lost in movies.

It's also really sad to think about too because there is this deep love I have for movies that is just so different than love I have for anything, or anyone, else. And when I'm not experiencing that, it's hard for me. It's like I suffer from withdrawal (isn't this just a wee bit pathetic when you think about it?). I have to see movies, and I particularly enjoy seeing new, amazing movies.

I admit, I am deeply upset that there is nothing like The Dark Knight coming soon to theatres. I was so excited for that movie and it was just so unbelievably amazingly awesome on so many levels (it satisfied my childhood Batman-fanatic geek, my Heath Ledger-loving soul, my Morgan-Freeman-Is-The-Awesomest-Badass-Ever side, my action-adventure love, my Deep-Yet-Not-Pretentious-Storyline obsession, and my fangirl like obsession with awesome filmmaking - the soundtrack! the editing! the cinematography! the sets!) and there isn't a movie quite like that this summer. Granted, I am hyping for Public Enemies like there is no tomorrow, but I know it won't be the same.

Regardless, I love movies, if you all didn't already know.

I rented a bunch recently. I watched The Forbidden Kingdom the other day and I liked it a lot. I remember the previews for it and I thought it looked wicked cool but I never got to see it in theatres (I admit, I was pushing for it on senior skip day, but nobody really cared and Liz was all like "NARNIA! NARNIA!" ...at least Ben Barnes is hot...) and I got to see it now and it was very cool. I'm returning to my action-adventure love, I think, especially since I also watched Hero today. It started with the English dub and I was like "uh, no" and went to setup to change it back to Mandarin.

Hero was awesome. It felt so Rashomon in the story-telling style, but with the action flair of the best martial arts films ever. And I loved Tony Leung in that movie. Everyone was great, but he always stands out to me when I see him (i.e. 2046, Infernal Affairs) for whatever reason. The art direction was fabulous, and although the moral of the story, the stance it takes, has a really frightening political meaning, there's a part of me that agrees with the idea that sometimes we do have to make sacrifices to have peace. Of course, this depends on the peace, and we don't want something like the third ending of Jade Empire (aka: totalitarianism and militaristically forced peace) to hold true, but fighting gets tiresome and not all battles are worth fighting.

Anyway, enough of my rambling. I just thought I'd share my latest film feelings since, as I said, there is this inexplicable relationship between me and the movies, a bond that I feel so strongly, and that allows me to bore everyone with extensive movie-chatter.

But I hope y'all love me anyway.

Peace (the good sort).

(BTWs: sidenote, I was in a much better mood today. The parentals? Less so. Oi frikkin vey.)

And a PS: Got my polisci paper and final back today. I am amazed I got a 99 on the final, and impressed by the A/A- on the paper. I was sure I screwed up the final, but I guess I was wrong. Hurrah! And among all the legitimate remarks on my paper, one struck me the most: there really isn't enough research, I think, into the many effects of video games, especially beyond whether or not it makes kids more prone to violence.

ALRIGHT THE END NOW.

May 13th, 2009

tags

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I think one of my favourite things about Entertainment Weekly's PopWatch blog is probably the tags. Sure, there are the ordinary tags like "American Idol 2009" and "The Biggest Loser" and whatever, but then there are the glorious tags such as "deals" (as in big deal, even though the rest of the world seems to have taken a cue from me and dropped the "big" part of that phrase... or maybe I'm just in tune with the world. WHO KNOWS?) and "Waiting" (doesn't it suck to get awesomely interesting information about upcoming projects and then... realize that the film/tv show/video game/book/etc. doesn't come out for weeks, months, or maybe even years?) and other more interesting tags such as "Things That Are Awesome!" and "Hello to the no!" and "I'm Just a Geek" and "The Bad Man Scares Me!" and "Cute Cat Videos!" (which was actually the subject of an entire post).

Did I mention that, aside from filmmaking, writing for Entertainment Weekly is essentially my dream job? Essentially, if I could just write about "and this is why Heroes was once awesome but now sucks" and about how I'll be very disappointed if Sherlock Holmes does not have a cocaine addiction in the upcoming movie mostly because a) the House wikipedia article told me he had one and b) because Guy Ritchie is directing it and therefore I expect some underworldly ongoings. I would also probably write about how I still have nightmares about Diablo Cody's get-up to the Oscars when she won for Juno but since she's a writer for EW I don't think they'd like that very much. And I need to work out a bit more before I can beat her in a fight.

So I totally think I have to start an entertainment themed blog this summer or else I'll die. Molly and Shellie and I will hopefully do it together because it won't work if I do it alone (how did "what claudia wore" get so popular anyway? I mean, it's wonderful, but many wonderful things remain undiscovered on the internet) and because Molly and Shellie are also wonderfully entertainment-friendly people with whom I hope to write many a review for the Bard Free Press next semester. :D

Anyway, I just thought I'd share my joy of EW's wonderful tags with you all. Also insert a couple flails over the House season finale (flailflailflail). Now to go back to reading about how violent video games are badbadbad.

May 12th, 2009

research

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I haven't IMed him. I don't think I will. I'll be the first to admit that I have chickened out. Maybe if another strange mood like that strikes me again I'll do it, but now I can't see the point.

Now, I'm sure reading about my bitching and moaning is really annoying so despite my pent up frustration, I'll try to keep this short.

SO CLOSE AND YET SO FAR is exactly where I am right now. In seven days, I will be back at home, all worries about schoolwork banished away until August 31st, time all mine, only worrying about getting a summer job, organizing trips to take, and catching up on Chuck. But... seven days is ridiculously far away from where I am standing. What have I left to do? Well, the three finals I have to do really are the least of my worries. My documentary final probably won't be too extraordinarily difficult, and even so, Molly and I are spending Thursday evening studying for the Friday morning exam. The Public Opinion, Political Participation, and Democracy in America final on Monday shouldn't be much worse than the midterm (which I got a very sweet 98 on), and with a bit of studying over the weekend, I should be able to tackle that baby. And my Revolution final, after tomorrow's study session in class (for which I still need to do some work tonight) and with some good old studying over the weekend, I'm not too heavily concerned.

So why all the fuss? Why am I so stressed out? Because on top of the finals, which are manageable, I've got a 10-15 page research paper to whip up by Tuesday for the polisci class. I took some books out of the library, I need to scour some journal archives, I need to do lots of reading, and then I need to write my fucking heart out, all in the midst of studying studying studying. Even that wasn't stressing me too much until I opened up moodle and saw the dreaded "(post a comment)" note next to over 40 pages on pdf reading that I need to do for tomorrow for that class. And here I am, exhausted out of my mind for spending loads of time on a shittastic FYSEM paper last night (at least it's my last one). Took a nice two hour nap, thinking I might just sleep and wake up early to work on the Revolution study guide, essentially, but then I log onto moodle and... no.

I shouldn't be complaining. It's really not that horrible. I just am so burnt out that doing all of this stuff at the very end seems like the stupidest idea ever. I am so totally ready to get out of here. I'm all set for next semester. Got my classes sorted out, I've got employment for next year, I'm beyond sick of the cafeteria food, and I just want to go. But, alas, I'm trapped here for another seven days in which I need to stop myself from enjoying anything because I really need to buckle down and work. My original plan to write up a first draft of my research paper last weekend flopped. But I need to get down to work tomorrow. I need to get down to work right now. If only I wasn't so freakin' tired.

So here you are. There's my whinefest. I am so over this semester. But... I can't be, not yet. And so I conclude this lametastic entry and will now go do the work I've been dutifully complaining about.

May 3rd, 2009

nightwish

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Well I put pictures up on Facebook for specifics, but essentially the gist of this title is that I saw Nightwish last night and it was bitchin'.

But that has nothing to do with why I wanted to write this post.

Topic A: So I fail and I still haven't talked to topic-of-last-post. >.> I may have lost my nerve. Also I haven't seen him on MSN when I've been on since I wrote that post.

Topic B: I don't want to do anything more this semester. :( I'm tired and I still have this obnoxious cough hanging onto me even though my cold's pretty much gone and I have no fucking clue what I'm going to write my final research paper for polisci on and I have to read a bunch for FYSEM and for polisci and take all my three finals and write my FYSEM paper and probably another one due after the semester ends because one week is not enough time to write a paper especially when in that week I have another massive paper and three finals to worry about and oh gahd I am stressing myself out and I have so much to do but so don't want to do it I just want summer. :(

Topic C: Classes... still pending pending pending. I have no idea my chances at them, although the Intermediate Spanish Professor e-mailed me back finally and said that I should get into the class because I got rejected last time even though she's in a pickle because, again, a lot of people want in. I'm hoping when I go in to talk to her, which is tomorrow after my polisci class (revolution is cancelled tomorrow because it's board week), I can actually complete sentences in Spanish. I'm so rusty though because I haven't taken Spanish in nearly a year and don't have many people to speak to in Spanish. I do know that I'm in the 16mm Film Workshop though, but I have to register for that manually later on. Gah. Double stress. :(

Topic D: Triple stress! Housing! Julie and I really want a double in the Village because the dorms there are nice and are in a decent location. Stone Row is a good spot because it's closer to all the buildings, but the dorms aren't that great, but that's our second choice. Aside from that, north campus is so far away from my classes... so hopefully my good room draw number will come in handy. Room draw on Tuesday! Crapola crappity crap, man. x.x

Soo.... I'm a bit stressed even though I'm not doing much. I should be reading for my polisci class right now but I'm tired and think I'll just wake up a little early and try and get the reading done in the morning. This post is way longer than I meant for it to be, so I'm gonna end it now. ...Yeah, now.

16 more days.

April 28th, 2009

battlestar

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Andrew in a fatsuit
It's over. I'm done. I FINISHED IT.

I don't think that I'm ever going to watch something like Battlestar Galactica ever again. I also don't think I've ever seen a better television show. And, Spoiler Alert!, I'm also incredibly upset that Lee and Kara never got the happy ending they deserved so much. I mean, seriously, despite everything else, there was always them. Even when they had their separate spouses, there was still something there. And once they didn't anymore, they deserved to be together. They deserved it so much. On the bright side, Gaius and Six got back together and Helo survived to be with Athena and Hera. Yes, I am so lame that I care so much about these pairings. But considering the need for the survival of the human race and the character bonds that formed over the show, this was necessarily deserved. I so totally cried when Roslin died, when Kara just vanished in mid-air. Kara's goodbye to Sam. Sam as the hybrid... it was unexpected but so fitting, really. But I'm not sure how I felt about the last ending so much. I mean, the first part "omg, the original Eve" and "omg, it's us!" was cool, but the robotics was a bit much...

Well, overall, this was the best viewing experience I've ever had, I think. I'm so sad to be done, to have nothing left to experience, nothing that's quite the same at least. There's The Plan and Caprica and Razor, but it's not the same. It's not exactly what I fell in love with during the past several weeks, just remnants that will allow me to feel closer to this experience. There was many imperfections, but so much that just worked, and in its entirety, BSG is very near-perfect.

I need to sleep because I'm feeling sick, but I just wanted to make clear what an experience it was to watch that television series. I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't seen it, and to those that have, you can understand my strong feelings towards it. I am so glad I watched that series, so glad to have spent my time on it, and I look forward to rewatching it in the future. But it'll be like Cowboy Bebop, in a way. Also an amazing series... but knowing how it ends, and knowing that there are loose, unhappy ends involved, makes rewatching very hard despite the pleasure. Part of me never wants to watch it again, to just savour the experience.

We'll see when I actually have the time. I'll probably change my mind. But for now... I'm going to revel in the experience I've had. I'll worry about revisiting it later.

April 19th, 2009

short

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Andrew in a fatsuit
Quit LA.

Happy Birthday to me!

I'm tired.

Good night. :)

April 14th, 2009

immersion

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I feel a lot better right now even though I know it's just the EYE OF THE STORM. Well, I don't have another paper due until next Wednesday and it's for Revolution and somehow my last paper, which was total shit and written so horribly at the last minute, got me a B+ so I'm not majorly worried although, no lie, I'm always anxious about all the schoolwork these days. But my third FYSEM paper and my polisci journal review are both done and handed in. Only four papers left (even though one is an evil monster 10-15 page research paper due on the very last day for polisci).

But there is some good to come of the world. My birthday is on Sunday. :D Although my birthday isn't anything special really (oh man, turning 19... uh... okay now I'm just getting older), I'm excited because Julie and Molly are coming home with me Saturday afternoon and then we're going to feast on chinese food, I'll make them watch the latest episode of Heroes, and then we'll go out and do exciting things with Laura and Carly, who is going to be home this weekend! And then on Sunday since the Dalai Lama cancelled on Albany (MAJOR DISAPPOINTMENT), my mom bought tickets to this show, "Spontaneous Broadway" at Proctor's, which reminds me of Whose Line Is It Anyway? as in audience members think up song titles and the performers come up with songs on the spot. Kinda goofy, but whatevs.

Aside from that, still no internship, but it might be better anyway for me to stay home and work for the summer. Maybe I can do some traveling. I'm planning to go to LA in August to see Molly and Julie and maybe I can take a trip down to Venezuela, especially if I do take Spanish next year, to visit my aunt.

Speaking of Spanish... this is where it gets crazy. The draft for next semester's course list just came out and, for whatever reason, I've been itching to learn German. There's just this weird appeal to me of Berlin as a film capital of the world and my German history and just the history of Germany in general that makes me want to learn it. The thing is, Basic German isn't going to be offered. Instead, in Spring 2010, they're offering German Immersion, which is a 12 credit, 15 hour a week, intensive course that leaves room for one other class (which would be a video production class for me). Not only that, but that's the semester I plan to moderate, so it's kind of totally insane. But I kind of want to do it. Also, the Intermediate Spanish class clashes with Screenwriting (which I really want to take) and it meets at 9:20am Monday through Thursday. Suck! I might be crazy enough to take three film classes next semester and then a buddhism class (not the Women in Buddhism class I wish was offered next semester, but the basic 100 level Buddhist Thought and Practice class).

I am so insane, but I am really tempted to do the German Immersion. I feel bad because I should be continuing Spanish, considering my six years experience with it and its general usefulness... but I also want to do German. I wanted to take German next year and just do Intermediate Spanish I this next semester and then II the following semester... I don't know. Maybe I should wait to take German next year. I don't think they'd offer the German Immersion two years in a row though... and it'd be INSANE to take it my senior year with Senior Project... and it seems like such an amazing opportunity as opposed to just taking regular German classes.

I wish I could take to my adviser about this, but he's relatively worthless. I don't think he's returning next year. He's not listed as teaching any classes in the film department, not even the class he taught these past two semesters.

Gah. This is only a draft so maybe it'll change. But for now I am totally bonkers over this. xD

Ramble Complete!

April 5th, 2009

fear

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(We interrupt your normal program of boring life updates and angst to bring you this breaking news story)
I tend to forget that we live in an age where weapons exist that could destroy everything in seconds... and all it takes is a little push.

April 4th, 2009

lame

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So I didn't get into Cabaret. I actually cared this time, but I shouldn't be surprised. Dance auditions went... eh. I'm so not a dancer. And my regular audition... well I just can't tell. That's a real problem. I can't tell if I'm any good at anything. I mean, in high school, I got roles and awards and shit for being "awesome" but it was more relatively awesome. And when compared with about a hundred other high schoolers as opposed to the rest of the world, it's not that hard to be awesome.

Every time I've tried to do something for real, in the actual world, I totally suck at it. This is only my second audition in college, but I didn't even get a callback this time. I auditioned for a show once when I was younger, early teenage years I think, 14 maybe? I had no idea how real auditions worked so I wasn't surprised nothing came of it. Just like not getting onto American Idol was totally deserved. And this whole internship hunt is sucking major balls. I haven't even heard anything from Jacob's Pillow and I was rejected from ATF and Glimmerglass, both of which I thought wouldn't be that difficult; surely, I could get into one of those.

I mean, I can't just totally suck in reality... but there doesn't seem to be substantial evidence against the claim that I do. The compliments could easily be wrong, and that's what I'm trying to not rely on, but it's all that I have to boost my confidence anymore. There are no more awards for me or shows I'm in where I can show off my "skills." I'm stuck doing nothing. Being nobody. Everything I do anymore is average. And the worst part is that I can't tell if I was ever actually talented or if I was fooled into thinking I was.

Sorry for the whinefest. This has just been tormenting me lately. Needed to articulate it.

April 1st, 2009

unfortunate

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So I THOUGHT that this week started out pretty well when my first couple classes weren't bad and I didn't feel too rushed and I got a 98 on my polisci midterm exam. But, alas, it's starting to stall. Firstly, after a really busy Tuesday, I return to my dorm around 10 to find that I have about 100 pages to read for my polisci class when I had been looking forward to lying down and relaxing for the first time that day. Then, although this grade was to be expected, I find that I received a B for my FYSEM midterm grade. And to top it all off, I wake up today to find an e-mail from ATF to hear that I've been rejected from an internship there, which I had been really hoping for since I had a good interview and it's in a nice location.

And I'm not even getting started on all the work I have this half of the semester. x.x

And today's supposed to be rainy again.

I'm unhappy.

March 27th, 2009

drunk

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Oh, btws, this is the film my group did for the 24 hour film festival: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=asXRKihocU0

Watch it. Love it.

Drunk Bitch rox.

galactica

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I'm totally going to revert back to utter geekdom once I finish Battlestar Galactica. I know it. And in the meantime, I'm going to be sleep-deprived and not doing my work because I am so into this show. Already, I know I should get sleep (as I am STILL fucking sick), but, alas, I'm going to stay up and watch the last two episodes of the first season. And I have to wake up in ten hours.

On the bright and Battlestar Galactica-free side, I'm going down to the city (NYC, duh) with my mom tomorrow. Going to spend the day lurking around, eating, maybe some shopping, and then going to see the new revival of West Side Story as my first Broadway show. Took me long enough to see a proper Broadway show considering how near I am to the city, how into theatre I am, and how close I've come (seen a couple off-Broadway shows). But I'm excited; I love West Side Story. Then back on the train and... the last two days of spring break. I have done no work so far, unless you count watching a couple documentaries to stock up for my Documentary Media class. I'm planning on reading Nietzsche on the train tomorrow. That's the only work I'm really concerned about. Aside from that, I have loads of reading for Revolution, but like hell I'm bothering with that (I haven't bothered doing the reading for that class in ages). If I have anything to do for my polisci class, it isn't posted. So I'm not too concerned, so long as I read my ass off on the train tomorrow.

I can't believe I've been sick almost my entire spring break. I may end up being sick the entire spring break as I'm still not better. I mean, I'm not feeling horrible or anything, but I'm still sick; coughing, stuffy, tired. I've been out to the movies once and I want to go again to catch Duplicity so hopefully I can manage that Saturday? If not, I'll just have to rent it later on.

This term felt like it was going so slowly and now it feels like it's going too quickly. 6 and a half weeks until the semester's over. I can't wait for it to be over but... I am SO not psyched about finals. x.x The midterms, and the midterm papers, were pain enough, and it's going to be double that.

Well... let's focus on the good. Battlestar Galactica is frakkin (seewhatididthere?) awesome. And, uh, yeah I'm out of the good right now. I'm just so nervous about the end of the semester. There's so much to do and so little time... both during break and during the semester.

Oh, other good. I'm going to see the Dalai Lama on my birthday. He's coming to Albany on April 19th, which happens to be my birthday (and, oh snap, it's my 19th on the 19th), and I am going to go see him speak. I'm psyched about that too.

Anyway, before I go into a full-blown panic attack about the end of the semester, I am going to end this rambly entry and go back to watching the next episode of Battlestar Galactica load frustratingly slowly.

>.<

PS: Is it kinda wrong that I want the Twilight DVD? Entertainment Weekly's bit about RPattz's commentary makes me really want to listen to it. Plus, it'll be great fun at parties where we can laugh and laugh and laugh and...
...okay, yeah, it's kinda wrong that I want it.

March 10th, 2009

kant

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Goddamn my life.

Just finished my FYSEM essay. I think it's a little bit better than the one I wrote last time, but it probably isn't considering I stayed up until 8am (a new record!) writing it.

Now I think I'm going to sleep for an hour before I have to go to class.

I am such a moron.
A really fucking tired moron.
...a moron who now has album artwork for most of her albums on her iPod?

Yeah. So not worth it.

March 8th, 2009

watchmen

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Finally got to see it and just got back from the theatre.

The verdict?

I liked it. I really did like it. It is nowhere near as good or as resonating or as astounding as the graphic novel (not to build up the novel too much, despite my love for it), but it is certainly enjoyable. It's incredibly difficult, imo, to compress Watchmen into an under three hour film, but I think they managed pretty well. And, to be frank, it's kind of nice that I don't want to watch all the little things. They add so much into the graphic novels, all the smaller supporting characters, but when you're watching a movie, they're just distracting, so it is kind of nice that they were reduced... although I am a bit disappointed by the shortening of Rorschach's history. I thought the casting was all really good (Nixon's nose was really distracting though), the script was incredibly faithful to the novel, and I liked that the costumes were updated (I'm sorry, Ozymandias' costume, for one, would have been SO campy on screen... as would had everyone else's really). The music was generally cool but some of it was a bit weird. "Hallelujah" playing when Laurie and Dan get it on in Archie was really bizarre to me. But, overall, I thought it was good.

Of course, this is coming from the perspective of someone who has read the novel. I totally understand if people who have not read the novel, or who go in expecting it to be on par with the novel, don't like it, or even hate it. I saw it with two other people who had read the novel and two who haven't. Rachel, who hasn't read the graphic novel, hated it, for instance. There were a lot of little things that weren't really explained (Bubastis, for one) and just too much that couldn't be put on screen in a single movie that made it hard for non-fan viewers to really relate to it.

In the end, I think that, for fans who want a nice little complement to the graphic novel, who would like to see a film version that, while not as good, is still good enough to watch, Watchmen is the perfect creation. However, if you wanted to make a film that made the story more accessible to people who haven't read it, this isn't the best example (although it does a better job than, say, some of the Harry Potter films for explaining most things). If anything, I hope this prompts all fans who see it with their non-fan friends to say, like Jen insisted to Rachel, "well, read the graphic novel. It's better explained and just better overall."

I enjoyed it. I might not bother seeing it again in theatres, but I'll probably buy it when it comes out on DVD. I think it would be nice to watch when I'm just not feeling up to committing to rereading the graphic novel (it's like why I own the Harry Potter films... only, I like Watchmen the film better than the Harry Potter movies).

March 6th, 2009

deprived

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Andrew in a fatsuit
I have not seen Watchmen yet. But I will! The 48 hour film festival I'm doing (film festival not as in showing movies but as in making them) has been turned into a 24 hour film festival so I have Saturday night and Sunday to myself... although I should dedicate Sunday to helping out on the film I've been working on, but I have a FYSEM paper I need to get done and also I neeeeed to see Watchmen. For reals. I don't care what the critics say (for once), I'm seeing it, possibly multiple times, and purchasing it when it comes out on DVD.

This past week was kind of crazy. I had two papers to write, one due Monday, the other due Wednesday. I stayed up until 4:30am on Sunday night/Monday morning doing the Monday paper, managed to get it in, go to my classes, and participate in a (relaxed) debate in my Revolution class between the communists and the anarchists. I was on the communist side. IMO (which is totally not biased), we won. Of course, we can't have really won because, as the anarchists pointed out, it was "imaginary." Tuesday... I felt really tired the morning for some reason and after I managed to get up felt really sick to my stomach so I skipped FYSEM. To make the week that much more awesome... I stayed up until 8am writing my paper due that afternoon, slept for what I had planned to be three and a half hours, but instead slept through my Polisci class (because my alarm was set to 11:30PM not 11:30AM) and part of my Revolution class. All of my professors were really cool about all of my absences this week though; My polisci professor even commented that he missed my input in class that day (I did too; I read the thirty-something pages for the class and found them really interesting). And my Revolution professor was like "yeah, my wife does that all the time."

I managed to make it to class on time on Tuesday, although it was a close call; I woke up 12 minutes before I needed to be at class and it takes about 10 minutes to walk there from my dorm. I got dressed that quickly. I got to class on time today as well, although Molly and I skipped out early because our professor's in California on conference and therefore it was a second screening and the first documentary was just ridiculously annoying and so by the time the second one was a bit in we were just like "screw this" and left.

I am so tired and so looking forward to sleeping in at least on Sunday if not tomorrow.

Anyway, that's enough of me recounting my sleep-deprived week; off to dinner and then on to the film fest!

Two weeks, two midterms, one papers, and loads of readings away from spring break!

February 27th, 2009

ukulele

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Is the ukulele the new guitar?

Also, Molly and I decided to do the Awkward German gesture at Conceited Bard Hipster Douche.

February 26th, 2009

bizarre

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So I was just writing my weekly report for Intro to Documentary Media and we're doing WW2 based propaganda films this week, so I just read comments by Andre Bazin on Why We Fight where he writes about the appeal of making documentaries based off of wars. Because of this, I thought it would be nifty if I wrote about the documentary No End In Sight as we are supposed to be watching a documentary a week outside of class (but not really; more like we're supposed to relate a documentary we've seen outside of class to the readings/discussions/other films we're watching) and write about said documentary. As it is about the Iraq War it certainly says something about the appeal of war-based documentaries, also the use of editing in No End in Sight is really poignant and it presents a particular viewpoint about from "hey guys, here's the Iraq War going on."

And then just as soon as I finished that and printed it out, I go to check my e-mail, and the Yahoo News story is: Iraq Withdrawl Gets Date.

This is weird because I said in my weekly report that there was still no end (I didn't add the "in sight" part because I knew that it was something Obama planned to work on, thank goodness). But what timing to have this announced at the same time I'm writing this!

Oh also I feel very proud; I did almost all of my documentary reading this week. I have all of it done except for the bit I have to read in one of our books I'm going to go do now; I just wanted to write my weekly report before I forgot about my idea. I just hope that my professor isn't like "well, ACTUALLY" about my comment on there being no end.

One more thing about documentary. So, today in our screening, we watched Listen to Britain and Triumph of the Will. The latter got kind of long and repetitive (its point, but as the Nazi regime isn't really one to be enthused about anymore, it got a little boring). So my film pal Molly and I ended up just fooling around 'cause the professor left at the beginning of the screening; staff meeting. There was this funny shot of this guy hanging on a pole during Hitler's visit to the Hitler Youth (I think that was the segment anyway) and Molly and I found this really funny and for some reason we started saying all these famous movie lines but adding pole at the end. Like, "I don't know how to quit you, pole!" and "You complete me, pole!" It was quite hilarious so we were laughing a lot. Also at the fact that Hitler's pants and belt, as well as most SS members, made his ass look really big. We also made up, based on the "awkward turtle" the "awkward German" where you do the awkward turtle, just where a moustache would grow (like Hitler's!) Then Molly was texting with her friend about the upcoming Spiderman the Musical and naming a bunch of funny song titles, and I started performing some of them. We found this all incredibly hilarious, including some other random stuff. And I couldn't control my laughter (I was really low on sleep last night), so I kept repeating, like "I know this isn't a comedy! But I can't stop laughing anyway!" Oh and I also had this awesome deja vu moment where I told Molly that I was writing in my notes about "check out the bitchin' Nazi flags!"

Anyway, I am not some idiot who would dare undermine the horrors that the Nazi party committed and all the shit that went down because of stuff like Triumph of the Will and the strength and power of Nazi Germany.

However, some lame kid in our class, disagreed.

After the screening ended, he came down to talk to me and Molly and he asked "You... you guys know that wasn't a comedy, right?" he said condescendingly. I gave him this look and responded with a "Yeah..." with a facial expression that said "duh." Apparently Molly has another class with him or else has heard more about him; apparently he's a douche; said he does a lot of playwriting and thinks he's the next Chekov. We bitched about him for a while until we parted. What a nosy little condescending bastard. Yeah, we're totally assholes who don't understand what that documentary was about or the impact of it and its featured star.

Thaaaanks typical conceited lame Bard student.

I actually love my college, but the stereotypical Bard student fails heavily. They wear skinny jeans, plaid flannel, bathe only occasionally, purposefully mess up their hair the right way, smoke everywhere, and try to sound ten times more intellectual than they actually are. Chances are they are more into experimental cinema and think "Brakhage is the shit" and that "Christopher Nolan should have stayed indie" and crap. They only listen to whiny bands no one has ever heard of, they usually have at least one facial piercing (nothing wrong with that), and bitch and complain about everything that's wrong with society while encouraging it. There's nothing worth than conforming to the "noncomformist" behaviour.

Yes, I own skinny jeans. No, I don't own flannel. Yes, I love Chris Nolan's Batman movies. No, I don't smoke.

Oh and I laughed during Triumph of the Will. I hate the Jews; Hitler was right!

Oookay shutting up now. >.>

February 25th, 2009

WHY

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http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2009/02/why-new-clue.html

WHY WOULD THEY DO SUCH A THING?
I am so mad at Hollywood right now for even considering remaking one of my all-time favourite movies!

In other news:
- Heroes spoiler: Unfortunately, my previous entry where I rejoiced over the death of Daphne was inaccurate... she's alive and around to make Matt as annoying as ever again. Ugh. Dammit. The latest episode wasn't as good as the first three were, but it was still better than Heroes has been. It felt like it was trying a bit too hard to relive Company Man but didn't have the same impact.
- I'm faring pretty decently with the Insanity difficulty level on Mass Effect. Dying often enough but less often than I expected.
- Two papers due next week, one due the following, and then a mid-term exam. Oh boy, how exciting. >.>

And life is life. Mostly I'm just still wtf-ing over remaking Clue.

Oh and the Oscars were good; for the first time ever I won at home (I won with 17 right out of 24; my brother and dad got 14 right and my mom got something below them).

February 21st, 2009

moronic

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Oh my god I am such a moron.

So, I applied to four different internships and I've heard back from two, well, sort of. I thought I'd only heard back from one all together, but I actually heard from Glimmerglass that they had received my materials and I heard back from the Adirondack Theatre Festival... and had a phone interview with them... but for some reason I thought they were Glimmerglass because I had totally forgotten about ATF in the first place (I applied there more on a whim than at Glimmerglass and the other more serious internship I applied to at Jacob's Pillow). I'm really hoping I didn't say Glimmerglass in my interview and didn't embarass myself too much.

I feel like such a total moron for screwing that up now. It didn't even occur to me until when I came home today and my dad asked me if I had heard from ATF and then I realized, just as I was heading off to sleep a few minutes ago, that "wait, wait a second, wasn't the woman with whom I talked on the phone's e-mail an @atfestival email? ...oh shit" and then I dashed downstairs to check and I realize now what a fool I've been! I can't believe I made that mistake! I know I made a reference to Cooperstown (which is where Glimmerglass is) and I was a little confused when the woman was talking about Glens Fall (where ATF is).

Oh jesus christ, I hope this didn't hurt my chances. And now I'm so paranoid it did and I am so much more worried than I was before and I am so distracted now that I can hardly go back to sleep. Oi freakin vey. I can't freakin' believe myself. x.x

Well, on the bright side, if this one doesn't work out, I know that I have at least two other options to hope for.

I could just headdesk myself to death right now.
...
headdesk
headdesk
headdesk
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